This post is actually my own comments/reaction to the posts by Laspapi, Tinuke, and Catwalq, I find it interesting that the usual scapegoats for this kind of forum are men. Meanwhile, the problem, as some people had already pointed out, is from other women.
Question: Who rules the world?
Answer: 80% of men agree that its the women. I still think only foolish men believe its a man's world. Remember the story of the head and the neck? For any woman out there who still believe that men rule the world, I say, talk to your mothers, they know better.
'The hand that rocks the cradle rules the world'. Read Chinweizu's 'Anatomy of Female Power' (still available on Amazon, I think).
The female of every kind is usually responsible for its organization into units etc. The male is just along for the ride (He is just 'organized' by a seemingly superior intelligence with or without his consent). Humankind is no different.
Women set up society for their own purposes and to perpetuate the matriarchal hegemony, it became necessary to set up a set of myths one of which is this myth of being the 'weaker' or 'fairer' sex as against the 'stronger' (read brutish) or 'unfairer' sex.
This imposes a burden on Man - poor Man - which he spends the whole of his earthly life trying to shake off but at every turn he is accused of being 'unfair'. Nothing he does is ever right. He has to deal with Woman on her moral high ground which she has set herself by virtue of being the 'victim' in every situation - even the ones she set up herself.
Question: Who set the rules?
Lets take them one by one.
Virginity: Who complained most when Brave One in Catwalq's story married Lost Lady?
Go and check, it was his mother! OK and maybe his sisters. I am sure his father, the Church Elder would have relented eventually (men have a way of letting such things slide) but the poor man would have had no rest in the bedroom from his wife's constant nagging.
Polygamy: Who instituted polygamy? (I know some guys will go 'Men, abi?')
It was the women! With all the inter-tribal wars and sorts going on then, it was necessary to take care of the women who were widowed and the responsibility fell on the more aggressive males in the society who were usually already married. As man no be wood and woman sef no be stone, the practices were formalized and consummated by - you guessed right- stupid men!.
Question: And when a man's gra-gra is getting too much in the society, who takes care of him?
Answer: Women. Go and read Soyinka's 'The Lion and The Jewel' again and discuss what happened to Baroka in the hands of Sidi & the other women in not more than 3 words (He Gat Fcuked!). And did I say A-B-A-C-H-A?
All mammals have hymen one way or the other but a female gorilla that has never mated is not more valuable (holier) than the one that has ten mates. We humans have glorified virginity even to the level of godliness.
Make I no go yarn enter trouble before a fatwa is placed on my head. Let's just say that the Prophet (SAW) did not discount the advise of women in laying down the rules as we now know them - particularly those of his wife.
FGM: I was in Nairobi, Kenya earlier in the year and got talking with some ladies from East Coast - Kenya, Eritrea, Somalia, Uganda, Zambia and Tanzania - and we got talking about 'female circumcision' (an oxymoron, if you ask me).
My ears opened at that discussion! In parts of Somalia and Eritrea, circumcised females actually have their own cult! It was explained to them - by the older women- that that was their own way of equalizing the sexes.
Since men were circumcised, women too are circumcised. (NOTE: I used present tense). All the ladies with me from that side were circumcised. By choice.
Even the flesh cutting act itself is carried out by women.
Talking about cults. Practically everything I know about the Oro cult, I learnt from - guess - my mother! (My Papa na 'enlightened' Lagos man. He didn't know jack about such things).
The conversation ended something like this:
Nimmo: .. but Mama Nimmo, you're not supposed to know about this thing like this now. You are a woman.
Mama Nimmo: Sharrapyamouth! Omode nse e. Who do you think started the whole thing?
You. Answer the question.
If women do all these and more to themselves, why blame us men? Look, its bad enough that we are largely passengers (spectators) in your world but its not fair to be accused of everything that goes wrong.
You chop the yam finish, you take oil rub my lips and you accuse me of starving you.
Give us some slack. Please.